I'm so bad at keeping up on here... sort of. But I've had so freaking much on my mind I need to get it all down. So this entry most likely won't be structured... e_e
It's so hot over here. We've already hit 112. And it sucks. Summer school gets out on Thursday. Woot... When I'm with dad I go uptown after school till he gets off work; when I'm with mum the manfriend picks me up. I like going uptown with my friends though. Except I tend to do things I'm trying not to... Damn temptation.
I love all my friends, distant and near. I love Zach and Ray and Lauren and Ryan and B... and all the aquaintances, too. I realise I'm more comfortable around the boys than the girls. Most of my closer friends are guys. I've always been like that. I feel like I fit in better with them. That reminds me... who wants to have the cool neighbour that lives two houses down and you can always drop by at one in the morning to watch a movie or just chill? Who the hell doesn't want that? I know I do!
I have problems. Who doesn't? My problems, however, are internal conflicts. I don't want to become my mum. I talked to B about this... and I believe Dave as well. Mum's a liar, cheater, thief... I don't wanna be that. But I can already see myself shaping into those things, and it's like slowly drowning, and there's only a minute chance I can get to the surface. People always tell us, "You definitely look like your mother." I used to like that, but now... I just don't say anything.
Oh yeah, the divorce. This past week she told me she's done trying to fight for me. Her life is "going too well and doesn't need the bullshit". Um, hellooo? Who was the cheating whore? Who wanted out? And now she doesn't need the bullshit because things are going too well for her? Fuck that shit. And then you ask, "Well, what about you?" Yeah, what about me? What am I to her now? An inconvienence? Spare me, I've always been that to her. It's no surprise. She never takes responsibility, she's proved that time and time again. Don't get me wrong, some part of me loves her, she's not all bad... or am I just using her to get what I want? Nah, I still do what she asks of me. It's not like I'm some fucking freeloader. Anyway, I'm happy enough that she doesn't want me, there's enough people out there who do, enough people to fill that void.
Another thing: I'm so glad she can't have anymore kids. Am I completely selfish for saying so? I asked her, I said, "Hey mum, if you still could, would you have another kid?" *Furious head-nodding* "You better believe it! I want to give Beto [manfriend] a boy so badly." Bleeeech. She's 48, she doesn't need to have another kid. What, does she just wanna start fresh with another kid? Have the "picture perfect" family? Did I not turn out how she wanted so she just wants to toss me aside and start anew? Am I meat? Am I seen as a walking T-bone? What the fuck! Anyway, I grin widly everytime I realise I won't ever see her with a maturnity bump. I'd feel sorry for the poor kid who turned out to be her kid. Oh, wait... that's me! Fuck!
I'm tired, literally. I've been going all day on only three hours. Each period in summer school is 2 1/2 hours. In first period I stayed awake only long enough to take the benchmark. Then I passed out. All we did was watch a movie anyway. My seat is RIGHT THERE in front of the speakers. I don't even know how I manage to get shut-eye with them there but it's actually quite easy.
I'm striving to become a real pro at English. I enjoy learning about it all, and I'm just a real stickler on it (in case any of you couldn't already tell).
An excerpt from an earlier conversation:
So lets see... as far as the sex goes... I kind of said that I wouldn't wait for marriage... and I probably won't... but I'm not just gonna have sex with someone because I like them or anything... and even if I do have sex with someone I don't later marry, I... I just don't want my first time to ever be a regret, because I hold that high. And honesty... if you're with a liar it just won't work. Honesty is the foundation of any relationship, and if you don't have it it's going to crumble. So I make it a point to not lie to my beloved, because, for one, I know how it feels to be lied to, and it hurts so badly I would never want to hurt my love like that... and even seeing my own parents... firsthand sight there. Mum's the liar, and it ultimately has led to this god-forsaken divorce.
Yeah, there was really no point to that... I just went on a bit of a tangent, except that's what we were talking about... so I guess it wasn't a tangent. 0_x Oh well, still a tidbit of my mind.
I'll try just about anything once. I tried wasabi for the first time on a tuna type sushi thingy. Apparently I also put on too much. But I popped it in... IT WAS HORRIBLY TERRIBLE!!! It burned and tasted like putrid feet stench!!! I can safely say I hate wasabi!
I will become a pro at German, you just watch. When I'm 18 I'm going to NC, you just watch. Just watch...
It's funny when someone's "subtly" flirting with you, yet it's frustrating when you can't just come out and tell someone you like them.
My philosophy is that God is the almighty smiteful smity smiting smiter, or whoever the hell is up there pissing on us.
I am a sarcastic little shit. Acknowledge that. Also, I frequently change my profile info, and occasionally my wiki.
There is a very good chance Tahoe's still happening. Although I'm still very excited, I'm not as excited as I would've originally been... Hmm, wonder why? e_e
Guys cheat. That's a fact. I want one who doesn't. Am I asking too much?
My PhotoBucket ID is Shotzie831. Feel free to browse my album. I have some of my art there, too. =)
I was recently in a situation where he was trying to persuade me, and he said, "C'mon, just a little bit?" JUST A LITTLE BIT??? You either stick it in or you don't!! There is no in between!! God, he must think I'm stupid or something! Bitch.
People visit my blog regularly. I greatly appreciate it, and always get back to everyone. But I feel bad that I myself don't go to too many blogs, just the ones that really catch my eye. I think I should make it a point to visit more often. I'll try hard to do so.
There are sooooo many songs out there that I want!! it's rediculous! I really like being turned on to new stuff, too. I have to thank a few people for helping me. =)
I've often wished I had a bounce house in my backyard, along with a pool... and a Taco Bell at my bedroom window. But that's just my wild imagination for you.
I think I'll go to bed now...
So, last week was my second week at mum's. I can say it went better than last time. She didn't put me in charge of the monsterous heap of dishes, and her house is soooo nice and air conditioned. This week I got a sweet German grammar book. It was eighteen dollars! We got it at Border's on Saturday after we got out of Edward's Theatres. Mum and the manfriend saw Hitchcock and I saw Wall E. It was such a cute movie!!! But I hate seeing movies alone, and was wishing I had someone with me... =)
Anyway, that was fun. Oh, yeah, before we went there we went to the Macaroni Grill, and that was my first time going there. That place is cool!!! Anyone who's been to one totally knows what I'm talking about. =D
But on all the other days I really wasn't forced to do too much; I had no bayonet poking at my back. The only odd thing that happened was that one night I talked to my ex literally all night, and spent the 4th of July at his place. It was fun. Just laid-back casual fun.
So yeah, I guess last week wasn't so bad. However, I am tremendously looking forward to this upcoming week!!! I finally get to talk to a buddy on the phone! I am so excited! =D <3<3<3
So, if you were to be placed on a deserted island, and you could only take one item, one person, and one type of food, what would they be and why?
All right, let's do this.
Well, the item would be my guitar because it doesn't require batteries and it can keep the insanity levels low. The person would be, um, well, it's a toss-up between my best friend Zach, Lauren, or Brannon. If I took Zach we'd get along but there may be procreation going on down the line and that would be bad. I could take Lauren because I never get tired of her and we're both quite smart and funny. But then again, I could take Brannon, I highly doubt I'd get tired of him... So... Brannon wins. =P Finally, the food would be a cheeseburger with the works, because that's still one item and I get lots of food groups.
If I ever met Mike* I'd probably kill him.**
*Name has been changed.
**Gender has been changed.
Are you tired of those sissy-ass "friendship" poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality? Well, here's a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship.
1. When you are sad-- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
2. When you are blue-- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
3. When you smile-- I will know you finally got laid.
4. When you are scared-- I will rag on you about it every chance I get.
5. When you are worried-- I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.
6. When you are sick-- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
7. When you are confused-- I will use little words.
8. When you fall-- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.
This is my oath... I pledge it to the end. "Why?" you may ask. "Because you are my friend."
Remember... A good friend will help you move... a REALLY good friend will help you move a body... let me know if you ever need me to bring a shovel.
Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.
Yesterday one of our dogs died. We knew she would, she was rapidly deteriourating over the past week. I'm always the one to find the animals dead, and indeed I found her. My vati buried her today. I am sad, but I didn't cry, and now the dog count is down to... eight. T_T
But today I went to a sweet pool par-tay!!! I had tons of fun!! Nora and I went. It was at this gated RV campgrounds in Chowchilla. When I got there this little girl took a liking to me, as most little kids do, so I hung out with her all day. We swam twice and I played her Nintendo DS, and I napped/toasted on a chair and ate and in the evening played cards with the adults. I just had so much fun!!!
Here's something for you guys. Can you tell me who this 100% true story is talking about? Don't cheat by looking it up, just take a guess. I would offer cupcakes to those who get it right, but my laywer advised me against it...
This is a true story of a boy who grew up to be president. He had a very humble beginning being the third child of a third marriage. His family was poor. As a child he loved to take walks along the river in his home town and he also enjoyed singing in the church choir. He never had the opportunity to expand his early education and most of his knowledge was self taught. As a young man he dreamed of being an architect or a famous painter of art. He loved to draw.
His first accomplishment resulted as a soldier in service to his country. He was wounded during a fierce battle defending his homeland and was twice decorated for bravery. This is where he gained a reputation for being a great patriot. After the war, this young hero placed his attention on the needs of his people. He gained more recognition as a public speaker since he was able to move some people to tears with his stirring remarks in favour of social reform and justice. He wrote a book that was so popular that its sales ranked next to those of the Holy Bible.
Later he became the editor of a major newspaper. Many of the articles he wrote were anti-communist, giving him something in common with people like Abraham Lincoln, John Kennedy, and the Pope. He placed a great emphasis on the health and well-being of young people. Personally, he never smoked or drank alcohol. He was a vegitarian. Like most people, he could not stand to see any inhumane treatment towards animals. There was a cultured side to him also, since he was a true lover of the opera.
At last this son of a civil servant rose to become president of the nation. Almost immediately he signed a number of peace treaties with neighbouring nations. At first people said, "You can't do that", however, he was able to overcome great obstacles. One of his closest friends once said affectionately of him, "He accomplishes great deeds out of the greatness of his heart, the passion of his will, and the goodness of his soul."
But, to sum up the majority of my week, I mostly cleaned, watched Degrassi, steal time to text on her phone, and clean some more. On top of that, my barren room is an oven and I didn't have all the neccessary stuff I needed that I had packed. Hopefully my second time will be better.
ninetiesIf you’re under the age of 12...you shouldn’t even read this, and if you do, you should not repost this.
Just because you were born in ’97 doesn’t mean you’re a 90’s kid.
It’s not like you could remember the original Simpsons.
I am sorry but three conscious years of the 90’s just won't cut it.
I've taken the liberty in highlighting everything that I can totally relate to.
You’re a 90’s kid if:
You remember watching
-Kenan and Kel
-Doug
-Ren & Stimpy
-Pinky and the Brain
-AAAAAAAH Real Monsters!
-Rockos Modern Life
-Animaniacs
-Gargoyles
-Rocket Power
You’ve ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"
You just can't resist finishing this: "In west Philadelphia born and raised"
You remember:
-Step by Step
-Family Matters
-Dinosaurs
-Boy Meets World
You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons
You remember reading "Goosebumps"
When everything was settled by:
-Rock paper scissors or
-Bubble gum bubble gum in a dish or
-Ms. Mary Mack
When kickball was something you did everyday!
You had a favourite song of ALL TIME.
Then, you used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVOURITE song of ALL time on a tape
You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genesis became popular
You remember The Original Game Boy
You always wanted to send in a tape to America’s Funniest Home Videos but never taped anything funny
You remember watching:
-The Magic School Bus
-Wishbone
-Reading Rainbow
-and Ghostwriter on PBS
You remember when Yo-Yos were cool
You remember those Where’s Waldo books
You remember eating Warheads and Splashers Gum
You remember watching:
-The 1st Batman
-Aladdin
-Ninja Turtles
-Ghost Busters
You remember Ring Pops
You remember when every thing was "Da BOMB!"
You remember boom boxes vs CD players
Making those little paper fortune cookie things, and then predicting your life with them
Making tons of cootie catchers
You played and/or collected "Pogs"
You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet, or Nano and took it everywhere you went
You watched the original cartoons of:
-Rugrats
-Wild Thornberry’s
-Power Rangers
-Rocket Power
All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand
You collected those Beanie Babies
Carebears
Silver dollars, which were cool to have
Everyone watched the WB
You even know what an original walkman is
You know the Macarena by heart
"Talk to the hand"
You went to McDonald’s to play in the playplace
Before the MySpace frenzy
Before the Internet & text messaging
Before Sidekicks & iPods
Before PlayStation3 or X-BOX 360
Before Spongebob
When light up sneakers were cool
When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs
When gas was under a dollar a gallon
When we recorded stuff on VCR
You had slap bracelets
You actually played outside until it was dark
Way back
Before we realized all this would eventually disappear.
...Geez this made my day. =D
And although I didn't highlight everything, I DEFINITELY rememeber all of these.
